Fearfully Wonderfully Me

Growing in God and Inspiring Young Women Through Faith and Fashion

I’m Getting Married!?

April 25, 2018 / / 12 Comments

The Big News

I have some news. Many of you may not be surprised by this announcement if you follow me on Instagram. However, since all of you lovely readers and followers are like family to me, I wanted to announce this formally on my blog.

Eleven months ago, I met a wonderful man named Owen who decided to pursue me. We’ve been dating and building a loving relationship that’s centered on Jesus Christ. On April 7th 2018, Owen asked me to marry him.

And I said yes!

I'm getting married!

We took this selfie shortly after Owen proposed. Of course, we were in Target. Isn’t that where every newly engaged couple goes? We were actually there to find a sizer for my ring, but I was so happy I just had to get a photo! I was so in shock that day, and sometimes I still can’t believe it.

Butterfly at gardens

Owen proposed to me at a local botanical garden, right outside of the butterfly house. We got some amazing photos of these stunning creatures! My initial reaction to his proposal was, “is this real?” I was honestly so shocked. Although now I can look back on my reaction and laugh, it was an incredible moment.

Owen and Emily--getting married

Now What? 

So what does this mean for the blog? Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere! I feel that the Lord is moving to keep growing this blog. Writing is the ministry that I am dedicated to, and encouraging other young women is still my passion.

If anything, moving on to this next phase of life will only enhance my blog posts. I now have more material to write on regarding Godly dating and relationships now that I have this experience. I’m no expert, but I’m sure the journey will definitely provide me with teachable moments to share.

Thank you so much for sharing in our joy! Owen is a wonderful guy who always makes me laugh. Everyday I’m with him feels like an adventure, and I look forward to countless more adventurous days as we build a life together. God is so good!

The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy. (Psalm 126:3 NIV)

Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

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3 Myths About Prayer and How to Pray Authentically

3 Myths About Prayer (And How to Pray Authentically)

April 18, 2018 / / 3 Comments

Jesus, I need You right now. How many times have I whispered these words–or sobbed them–in desperation.

When nothing else works, and all of my strength is used up, I finally let down my defenses and say the simple words. I let God in.

But that’s the thing about prayer that most people don’t understand. Even I didn’t understand for the longest time. Prayer is not a one-way request line to heaven, but an intimate conversation with God.

Sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes it’s silly. But it’s always real and always raw.

Of course, we must unlearn a lot of what culture and other Christians have taught us about prayer in order to fully dive into these real conversations with Jesus. Read on to learn 3 myths about prayer, and how you can pray boldly and authentically.

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3 Myths About Prayer and How to Pray Authentically

Myth #1: Prayer Needs to Sound Holy

You know holy prayers. The ones that sound all reverent, tip-toeing around raw human emotions that are a little undignified or ugly.

The one thing we must understand to combat the lie of holy prayers is that holiness is not something we can attain by ourselves. If we could, then Jesus’s sacrifice on the cross would be a wasted effort.

And by that will, we have been made holy through the sacrifice of the body of Jesus Christ once for all. (Hebrews 10:10 NIV)

Let me tell you this, lovely one. The death of our beautiful Savior was not in vain. And when we choose to give our lives to Christ, we are giving up our own false sense of holiness for His true holiness.

So if our prayers don’t need to sound holy, what should they sound like?

The opposite of a holy front is vulnerability. God doesn’t want what sounds good or proper, He wants what’s in your heart. The pain, the fear, the anger, the joy. All of it. Of course we should still view God with reverence, but we can worship God’s holiness and still be vulnerable.

When my heart was grieved and my spirit embittered, I was senseless and ignorant; I was a brute beast before you. Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. (Psalm 73:21-23 NIV)

The author of this Psalm isn’t pretending, nor is he holding back. Real vulnerability is humility. It’s trusting God enough to surrender our feelings, and in return, let Him fill us with His Holy Spirit.

Myth #2: Prayer Needs to Be Long

Have you ever been in a prayer circle with someone who takes forever to pray? Of course, they might just have a lot on their heart, and that’s cool. But I’ve noticed that when someone around me prays long and intricate prayers, I want to copy them.

God isn’t impressed by the length of our prayers. Longer prayers aren’t more attention getting, nor do they grant us more favor.

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. (1 John 5:14 NIV)

Our prayers do not need to be loud and showy in order to get God’s attention. When it comes to prayer, we as Christians can boldly approach God and ask Him anything. He hears us, and He knows just what we need.

Instead of longer prayers, we need bolder prayers. If we have the confidence that God is listening and is always there to help us, then we are empowered to pray boldly and simply. 

Myth #3: Prayer Needs to Be Repetitive

I know I’ve been here. My anxiety-prone mind loves repeating prayers–just to be sure God hears me. As if repeating a specific prayer will make things go my way.

But we know prayer doesn’t work like that. God already knows our thoughts (Psalm 139:2) and is not impressed by a lot of fancy words.

And when you pray, do not use vain repetitions as the heathen do. For they think that they will be heard for their many words. “Therefore do not be like them. For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.” (Matthew 6:7-8 NKJV)

God is a good Father whom we can trust. Our repetitive prayers can be a sign that we don’t trust Him to do what is right in our lives.

This doesn’t mean we can’t ever repeat a prayer. In fact, the Bible tells us to be persistent in prayer. The difference is in our level of trust.

When we don’t have faith that God will come through for us, we repeat our prayers out of fear. However, persistent prayer can be a reminder of how faithful our Heavenly Father is.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV)

Prayer looks different for everyone, and there is no correct length or specific words to say in order for God to hear us. True prayer is a conversation with Jesus. It is pouring your heart out and then waiting in God’s presence. It is vulnerable, bold, and persistent.

Authentic prayer is when our heart’s desire is to connect with the heart of God.

Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

Check out my 3 Myths About Purity post here! 

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What Godly Confidence Really Looks Like

What Godly Confidence Really Looks Like

April 12, 2018 / / 6 Comments

Nothing can squelch self-confidence like having health issues. Having physical limitations and not being like everyone else is hard. And it’s something I’ve struggled with for the last six years.

Although God has done tremendous healing in me and blessed me with excellent healthcare, there are still moments of struggle. One thing I choose not to do is drive. I have POTS and vertigo, which make driving uncomfortable.

I have some visual sensory issues and great anxiety with driving, and this has affected my confidence in significant ways. Not only is not being able to drive inconvenient, but it’s also a little embarrassing when you’re almost 24 years old and graduating from college. But it’s still my choice–at least for now.

The world preaches for us to have self-confidence, but what happens when that fails us? What happens when we screw up, or when the person we trusted wholeheartedly lets us down?

What I’ve learned over the past six years is that in order to have a lasting confidence, you must be rooted in God-confidence. Read on to find out what Godly confidence truly looks like.

Running to God

Where do you run to when you feel weak? Where do you turn to in times of trouble? As human beings, we tend to seek others for comfort and familiarity. This isn’t bad, as God created us to be relational people.

However, when we completely depend on others to make us feel good about ourselves, we turn into people-pleasers who can lean towards perfectionism.

“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! (Isaiah 49:15 NIV)

The thing is, people will let us down. Even those closest to us can wound us deeply, but the Lord never will. Jesus is always there for us and goes before us. Even though it may feel like we are alone, He never abandons us.

When we realize that we can always turn to God and that He is our refuge in times of trouble and pain, we develop strong confidence when life gets rocky.

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Godly Confidence

Confidence is rooted in trust. When we trust in the Lord, we know that our confidence will never be shaken.

I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” (Psalm 91:2 NIV)

Listening to God

It’s almost impossible to feel confident when people make you feel like you aren’t good enough, pretty enough, or smart enough. But I’ve come to realize that this will happen again and again.

Satan can even warp the words of those who love us to make us believe lies about ourselves. So who do we trust? Do we place our confidence in the words of others, hoping to hear nothing but positive things? Or do we turn elsewhere?

Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’” (Matthew 4:4 NIV)

A truly confident woman roots herself in the Word of God. The Bible will always be true and relevant to our lives, no matter how much time passes.

Just look at my past posts! Everything I write is based on what the Word of God says. He says we are loved, valued, redeemed, and set free. We have purpose. Anyone who tells you otherwise is going against the truth.

Instead of believing the lies of the world, root yourself in scripture. Your confidence will grow as you begin to speak the truth over your life.

Remembering God

When we feel like life isn’t going our way, it can zap the confidence right out of us. I know I hate feeling like I’ve lost control, but the truth is, it was never in my grasp to begin with.

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps. (Proverbs 16:9 NIV)

Although we should have plans and goals for our lives, we need to remember that God is sovereign. When we forget that He is on the throne of our lives–and of the whole universe–then we start depending on ourselves.

We cannot create the perfect life for ourselves. Things happen that are beyond our control, and that can actually be for the better. Although I don’t always like having a chronic illness, my healing journey has increased my faith and led me closer to God and to people in ways I couldn’t imagine.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28 NIV)

When we surrender our dreams and our will over to the God of all creation, we can rest peacefully and confidently knowing that we will be taken care of.

Jesus has called us into a great life. Yes, that does come with pain and struggle since we live in a fallen world. But it also comes with abundant blessings that can only come from confidence in God’s faithfulness.

I know that self-confidence will never last in the long run. The only true source of eternal confidence comes from running to God, soaking up His Word, and remembering that He is always faithful.

This, lovely one, is true confidence.

Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

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3 myths about purity and the freeing truth

3 Myths About Purity (And the Freeing Truth)

April 4, 2018 / / 10 Comments

There’s a girl driving by a church, shaking her head because she knows she’ll never fit in. She’s slept with more than just one guy, and is now too dirty to enter heaven. How could God ever want her when all she was good for was her body?

There’s a girl in youth group, pretending to have it all together. No one needs to know that she went just a little too far with her boyfriend. It was no big deal anyway. It was just a passionate make out session, right?

There’s a girl listening to a sermon on Sunday morning, nodding her head to the line about purity. She has been saving herself for marriage for over two decades now. She takes great pride in her purity, and knows it will bring her the reward of a good husband one day.

Do any of these girls resonate with you, lovely one? I know I can relate. The thing is, all three of these girls are buying into the myths about purity that have pervaded our culture.

It’s time to find the truth in God’s Word and be set free. It’s time to expose the 3 myths about purity, and discover what true purity really is.

Myth #1: Purity is Achievable 

Perhaps the biggest lie surrounding purity is that it comes from our own actions. That somehow, we can make ourselves pure if we act a certain way or abstain from certain things.

If this were true, then we wouldn’t need a Savior. The truth is, all of us give into issues with lust or sexual boundaries in some way–even if it’s just in our minds.

Purity encompasses more than just sex anyway. Sin is what makes us impure. And guess what? We’re all affected by it. Since the fall of man in the book of Genesis, we have all suffered from the stain of sin.

But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. (1 John 1:7 NIV)

When Jesus died on the cross, He sacrificed Himself to free us from all of our sins. We are cleansed only by the power of His blood, not by our own actions.

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Myth #2: Sex is Not Sacred

Another myth about sex is the idea that sex itself is impure or dirty. Just the mention of the word makes us blush, right?

But the  truth is that sex is pure, beautiful, and sacred–in the covenant of marriage.

That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24 NIV)

God ordained marriage so that a man and a woman could become one in every way, including physically. Sex is for more than just procreation, although that is miraculous in itself. Sex is an expression of powerful love and bonding reserved exclusively for marriage.

God isn’t withholding sex from us because He wants to ruin our fun. He is a good Father who loves His children, and He wants what’s best for us. It can definitely be hard to wait, especially in modern culture. But it’s worth it. 

The world wants to sell us a cheap counterfeit of sex with no limits, but this is damaging. We all know of the consequences of premarital sex. Saving yourself for a loving, Godly marriage will be way more fulfilling than the counterfeit the world has to offer.

Myth #3: Sexual Sin is Unforgivable 

The final myth about purity that needs to be exposed is that once you’ve had sex, or lusted in any way, that you’re beyond redemption.

We tend to treat sexual sin as if it were the worst sin to commit, when in reality, sin is sin. Yes, sexual sin does have earthly consequences that are painful, such as emotional trauma or damaged marriages.

But no matter what you’ve done, you are never beyond God’s salvation. Jesus doesn’t want your perfection. He wants you to submit your life to Him and let His love transform you.

…while we wait for the blessed hope—the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good. (Titus 2:13-14 NIV)

Remember those three girls you first read about? It doesn’t matter which one you’ve identified yourself with.  As a daughter of God, you have been called to find yourself in in His Son. The world can never take your purity away when it’s rooted in Jesus.

purity rooted in Jesus

Purity isn’t a chore, and it isn’t something than can be achieved. It does not bring us the reward of a future spouse, nor does it condemn us forever. When we choose to fully give our lives to Christ, we then discover what purity really is–a life surrendered to God.

For more on purity, check out this awesome post by blogger, Ashleigh Rich! 

Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

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What Failure taught me about surrender

What Failure Taught Me About Surrender

March 28, 2018 / / 8 Comments

Ever have one of those days when your thoughts seem to be haunting you? Lately, those days have been frequent for me.

I feel as though God has been working on me about confidence and my identity in Christ, but my own mind likes to self-sabotage.

Life is changing rapidly for me, as I am finishing college and will be getting a real “adult” job. The class and internship work is piling up, and now I know what my friends meant by the term senioritis.

All of this is a recipe for stress and opportunity, and that also means failure.

And I hate failing. I really hate failing.

As a perfectionist, I struggle with anxiety and self-esteem issues. But I know I’m not alone. There are so many people out there who struggle with anxiety and depression.

As I’ve been praying to God about all of this, there is one word He has laid on my heart.

Surrender.

Surrender is the key to freedom, and it is also transforming. If you’re struggling with negative or haunting thoughts, then I urge you to keep reading about what surrender has taught me.

Surrendering Our Broken Pieces

I’ve been a serious Christian for a few years now, and I always thought that surrender just meant giving all of my plans and dreams to the Lord–to let Him have control of my future.

But surrender is so much more than that.

Yes, we should surrender our plans and our desires to the Lord. His plans are better than anything we could ever dream of. And when we trust in God, He will lead us on the most amazing journey ever.

But there’s a lot more to surrender than just giving up the good parts of our lives.

Pain, shame, sin, and fear. These are the things the enemy wants us to hold onto. This is how the devil keeps us in bondage.

Surely he took up our pain and bore our suffering, yet we considered him punished by God, stricken by him, and afflicted. But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed. (Isaiah 53:4-5 NIV)

When Jesus took up the cross and died for our sins, He also bore all of our shame and pain. All of the things that haunt us and hold us back from a great life are things He died to free us from.

Christ died to nail our broken pieces to the cross. And He left an empty grave behind in order to fill the emptiness in our lives.

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Christ fills our emptiness image

The Transformation of Surrender

When we get stuck in our pain or fears, then we get wrapped up in ourselves. We start to feel bad about our lives, and then an evil menace seeps into our hearts.

Pride.

I know that when I have a bad day and think of all the mistakes I’ve made, I miss out on opportunities to do good things for others.

When we get too wrapped up in ourselves, then we cannot fully serve the Lord. It’s the enemy’s trap, but we have the keys to freedom.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! (2 Corinthians 5:17 NIV)

When we choose to follow Christ, we become new creations! We can surrender our pain and mistakes and choose to live a new life with God.

None of us are perfect, and that is why Jesus died for us. This is what Easter is all about. The blood of Jesus covers us, and His grace is bigger than any of our mistakes.

Each new day with God is a fresh start, and we can always choose to move forward in victory.

But it all starts with surrender.

Thanks for reading! I hope you have a blessed Good Friday and Easter. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

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