Fearfully Wonderfully Me

Growing in God and Inspiring Young Women Through Faith and Fashion

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How Fear Becomes Faith

I didn’t realize what a hypocrite I can be until I broke down in my room a couple of weeks ago. I was in the midst of making decisions about my education and the fear of the future was absolutely crippling.

I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t even write. I was crying and crawling into my bed, wishing that I could just quit adulting.

Ever felt that way before, lovely reader? I have a feeling I’m not alone.

The only problem is that I didn’t feel like I could turn to God.  

I write a lot on overcoming anxiety and trusting God, so freaking out and having a meltdown makes me feel like a huge failure–like my faith isn’t real enough. 

Eventually God tugged at my heart enough to pray. And that’s when it hit me. Jesus freaked out too. Don’t believe me?

Then Jesus came with them to a place called Gethsemane, and said to the disciples, “Sit here while I go and pray over there.”  And He took with Him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and He began to be sorrowful and deeply distressed. Then He said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch with Me.” (Matthew 26:36-38 NKJV)

Jesus was greatly troubled in the garden of Gethsemane–enough to sweat drops of blood (Luke 22:44). I believe this is God’s way of saying, “I get it. I understand your fears. It’s okay.”

It’s okay to be afraid sometimes.

Is that hard for you to read, lovely reader? It probably is, considering that most Christians are taught that fear is a sign of a lack of faith. Now I’m not saying that we should go around living in fear all the time, but God can actually take our fears and work wonders in them.

Jesus was with me that day I broke down. He made me ask myself, do I trust Him enough to open up about my fear? Am I ready for that kind of intimacy with God?

If you want to let go of your fears, then you’re going to have to let Jesus experience them with you. 

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. (1 Peter 5:6-7 NKJV)

How great is our God that He constantly wants to talk with us? Although a lot of times we try to figure out how we should feel and pray, God just wants us to come as we are.  We can only grow when we are honest and vulnerable, allowing God’s power and grace to work within us.

This is how fear becomes faith. 

I know that I am slowly growing in my faith and learning to trust Jesus. But in the meantime, I’m going to let Him into all of my human moments and feelings–even the messy ones.


Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

Connect with me on Instagram @fearfullywonderfullyme

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Mystery Blogger Award!

Hello lovely readers and followers! Today is a great day because I have been nominated for the Mystery Blogger Award by the creative, funny, and wise blogger,  Dainty M. I love getting these awards, as it shows just how strong the bonds are between writers in the blogging community. Though they may require effort, they are also a blast. So let’s get started!

This award was first initiated by the wonderful Okoto Enigma, and I think it’s a great way to meet other like-minded bloggers and make new friends.

Here are the rules of the award

  1. Display the award logo on your blog.
  2. List the Rules.
  3. Thank the blogger who nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
  4. Mention the creator of the award and provide a link as well.
  5. Tell your readers three things about yourself.
  6. Answer five questions from the nominee.
  7. Nominate anywhere from ten to twenty bloggers.
  8. Notify the bloggers by leaving a comment on their blog.
  9. Ask your nominees any five questions of your choice, including one weird or funny question.
  10. Share the link to your best post.

Three Things About Myself

  1. I’m a daughter of God, and I strive to honor Him everyday.
  2. I firmly believe that napping is a lifestyle.
  3. I love hair and makeup. I’m not the best at it, but it’s a passion of mine.

Dainty M’s Questions

1. What’s your favourite season of the year?

I really love spring and fall. It’s neither too hot nor too cold, and the transition of the seasons is beautiful.

2. What’s the one thing you’d do if there was no stopping you?

I would get on an airplane and fly to the beach!

3. Soda or juice?

Soda–Diet Coke is my favorite source of caffeine.

4. What’s your idea of fun?

Eating, shopping, reading, writing, sitting outside, and talking with friends.

5. One piece of advice you would tell your younger self?

Your worth is in Jesus alone–not looks or performance. You don’t have to do anything to earn God’s love.

My Best Post

This is kind of a tricky question, but I think that this post is one of my recent favorites.

I Nominate

Courtney

Wendy

Karina

Dan

Wally

Grvya

Tianna

Beckie Lindsey

Questions for My Nominees

1. Would you rather skydive or bungee jump (if you had to choose)?

2. Name a pet peeve of yours.

3. What do you like to do to relax?

4. What is something you’ve learned over this past year?

5. What’s your favorite summertime treat?


Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

Connect with me on Instagram @fearfullywonderfullyme

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Out of Focus

I didn’t realize I was having a panic attack until I couldn’t breathe. I felt my throat constrict as I tried desperately to remember how to control my inhales and exhales. The only thing that seemed to bring me back was saying the name of Jesus.

Anxiety is not something that is easily understood. I think that a lot of times, Christians simplify it by saying that anxiety is just a sign of a lack of faith. Even I was starting to wonder if my belief was strong enough.

However, my world-shaking experience that day was not just from a lack of faith. I finally realized that, at the root of my anxiety, I had somehow lost focus on God. I knew that I could trust Him,  but He wasn’t at the forefront of my mind and heart in the way that Jesus should always be.

Sound familiar? It’s actually something the Apostle Peter experienced.

So He said, “Come.” And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, “Lord, save me!” (Matthew 14:29-30 NKJV)

Although most of us look at Peter’s rebuke for having a lack of faith, we often forget where this unbelief and fear actually originated. Peter lost his focus. Instead of looking toward Jesus as he took his steps on top of the violent waves, he got distracted by the storm around him.

I am a Peter sometimes. I step off of the boat and into some of the great things that God has called me to be a part of, and I forget to fix my eyes on Him.

I am so busy trying to be the “good girl” and please those around me, and do anything  that I can to help and make up for my weaknesses. My intentions are good, maybe even noble, but they’re also deceptively self-destructive.

Now that I’ve made the decision to step back from a couple of things, I’ve found a small void that can now be filled by the presence of Jesus. I can let Him in even more.

Work is good. School is good. Ministry is good. But what happens when jobs, positions, and people become idols in our lives? What happens when they fall apart or are ripped away from us?

But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me.”

 And Jesus answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:40-43 NKJV)

We can easily fall into the Martha trap of doing and serving (which is fine when done right). But when things stop going our way or become too much, we realize that what we really need is to focus on God and rest in His presence like Mary.

Falling apart or feeling anxious when life gets stressful does not make you a “bad Christian.” It makes you human. At least you’re stepping off of the boat.

Lovely reader, you don’t have to live this way permanently. Little by little, start fixing your eyes on Jesus. Put  your time, thoughts, and energy on His unrelenting love.

Right now, I’m still learning to do this, but that’s okay. God is still walking with me, cheering me on. He is for me, and He is for you too (Romans 8:31)! Even in my moment of dire panic, He never left my side.

For now I’ll keep pressing in and reaching out to Jesus, trusting that my fears will keep fading, until they are no more.

You will keep him in perfect peace, Whose mind is stayed on You, Because he trusts in You. (Isaiah 26:3 NKJV)


Thanks for reading! Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments below 🙂

Connect with me on Instagram @fearfullywonderfullyme

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