Fearfully Wonderfully Me

Growing in God and Inspiring Young Women Through Faith and Fashion

Tag: self-esteem

The Most Beautiful Girl

March 9, 2016 / / 10 Comments

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Yesterday was International Women’s Day–a day to celebrate the accomplishments and milestones of hardworking and inspiring women everywhere. Even though I am proud to be a woman of God and be honored with such a holiday, I can’t help but feel sad. So many girls and women struggle with the most basic of questions–am I beautiful?

Even though to some the question of beauty shouldn’t be an issue to what a woman can accomplish, let me tell you that it is a huge deal. If a woman does not feel like she is beautiful, or if she is not comfortable in her own skin, then she cannot fully step outside herself and love others with the selfless love of Christ. 

And before y’all go crazy, this is Biblical:

 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these” (Mark 12:30-31 NKJV).

As we read these two verses, we nod our heads and agree that we should love God with everything in us. After all, He sent His one and only Son Jesus to die for our sins so we could be free! But then there’s the second greatest commandment, the only other one that we are responsible for trying to keep: love others as we love ourselves. 

It’s amazing how astoundingly well the Bible knows us. No verse is in there by mistake–including this one. If we don’t really love ourselves, then we can’t love others. In fact, if we don’t love ourselves, then we can’t even love God (at least not to the fullest)!

If you’re reading this and are struggling with issues of poor body image or low self-esteem, I’m not writing this to attack you. I get it–I’ve been there. As a matter of fact, this is still a daily battle for me. And the reason I’m writing this is so you can see how important it is to finally start accepting and loving yourself for the fearfully and wonderfully made woman that you are (Psalm 139:14).

 So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them (Genesis 1:27 NJKV).

You are made in God’s image! In some way, you resemble God. Maybe it’s your skin, your hair, the way you walk, or your laugh. You are God’s child, and like any child, you resemble your Heavenly Father in some way. And what could be better than to resemble the God of the entire universe? 

As a follower of Jesus Christ, you actually have God inside of you. Your body is a holy temple (1 Corinthians 6:19-20), and is sacred to the Lord. You are not just flesh and bone. You are not just a shell. You hold the powerful Holy Spirit inside of you.

Your body–no matter what shape, size, or color–is made to do the will of God. It is made to love, serve, live, and be loved. You were made to laugh and go on adventures. You were made to dance in the rain or kiss your true love under the stars. You were made to have pizza nights with friends and sing at the top of your lungs. You were made to live life to the fullest. 

The most beautiful girl in the world is not the one who is the skinniest or who has a perfect complexion. The most beautiful girl is the one who knows how much God loves her. She walks with a spirit of grace, elegance, and confidence that nothing else can measure.

that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height—to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God (Ephesians 3:17-19).

If you don’t realize how much God loves you, then I encourage you to look up these scriptures as well as the rest of the Gospel. If you don’t know Jesus as Lord and Savior, then please visit this page.

We really can’t even begin to comprehend how much God loves us. But the more we learn about His incredible love, the more it makes us love Him. And this love will radiate to everyone around us.

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to comment and share 🙂

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Hope–A Letter to Myself at 16

March 2, 2016 / / 8 Comments

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Dear Emily at Sixteen,  

Hey girl, it’s your twenty-one going on twenty-two year old self–the “older, wiser self” you’ll constantly wonder about in the future. I just want you to know that it’s okay, you’re going to make it.

That boy you love–the one you’re clinging on to so desperately–he will shatter your heart into a million little pieces. It’s okay; it will hurt more than anything you’ve felt in a long time, but you will be okay. There is beauty in the breaking, and in it you will find true love and life. And yes, you will fall in love again. And you will get your heart broken–a few times actually. You’ll also be the heart breaker, and you will learn that love is rarely a fair game of give and take.

It’s worth it though–never regret falling in love. It’s the closest we can get to the moon and stars without actually being in heaven.

This coming year will be one of the most difficult years of your life so far. That seed of low self-esteem will sprout into a hatred you thought could never happen. Suddenly the mirror will become the enemy, and so will every single bite you take.

Little girl I wish I could stop this. Letting this happen is the one thing I regret in my twenty-one years of stupid mistakes. Instead of viewing your body as a temple, you will see it as dirty, too fat, too skinny, too weak, too ugly, and not ever enough.

And it won’t be enough. It won’t be enough to keep him around. It won’t be enough to make you popular, or better than your friends. It won’t be enough to make your father put you first again. Little girl you can’t change people, and you can’t stop the world from breaking your heart. For the next four years you will feel inadequate, but then something beautiful will happen.

This beautiful thing is already unraveling inside of you. As you lie awake at night over the next few years, crying and feeling swallowed up by the whole universe, you will feel that gentle pull. Even when you want nothing more than to just escape and end the pain and anxiety, you’ll know you’re not alone. As you lie awake, crying out to God, you will start to feel His presence. Hold on to this with everything in you. Hold on to this hope, because it’s the only foundation that won’t let you down–even when everything else does.

This hope and your desperate longing for something more will lead you to the doors of a wonderful church. It will be a battle, but eventually you will find out how much God truly loves you. All those days and nights of feeling numb and you wondered, am I alone? You’re not alone. Jesus loves you just as you are. Nothing you’ve done can make Him love you any less. He died so you could know that–plain and simple.

Bit by bit, as time goes on, you will learn to surrender to God’s incredible love. This will hurt at times, as He will demand more out of you than you are willing to give. Slowly you will learn to give Him your trust, your insecurities, your relationships, your fears, and all that comes with your old life.

I’m not going to lie–the depression still creeps up sometimes, and anxiety will still cage your heart and mind like wings wrapped around too tight. But God is there, and you will get through it. 

You will see your dad again. You will be scared, you will cry, and you will fight. But you will also laugh, give, and love. He’s still the same as always, but your heart will finally be released from any guilt or anger.

Emily, I am writing this to make peace with you. It feels like we’ve been waging a war with each other for far too long. I just want you to know that you are beautiful. You always have been, and you always will be. Soon you will come to realize that true beauty is the essence of a woman’s spirit. 

Emily it’s not your fault when people hurt you. We are all flawed, and people make mistakes. It is theirs’ to own–not your’s. Forgive them and move on; maybe you will have to move on without them, but it will be okay.

Emily you have a future. Life will always be a bit scary and unknown, but that’s all part of the adventure.

Here’s what I want you to remember. Love others, and give them your time to help them. This will bring you the greatest joy. Go through the hard times. They will mold you and shape you, and continue to build your faith. Cherish your family, because people are fragile and this life with them won’t last forever.

Be yourself, and know that it’s okay to love Disney, collect dolls, and do yoga at ten o’clock at night. Never stop writing, but let the Lord help your words blossom onto each page. Most of all, hold on to your faith. It will take you to places you could never even dream of. Remember that God loves you and is holding your hand, and He never lets go.

Love, Emily.

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to comment and share. I only ask that you link back to my blog for credit 🙂

This is one of the most difficult pieces of writing I have ever shared. But it is so worth it! I hope my words speak to each one of you lovely readers, no matter how young or old you may be. You are beautiful and you are loved by the One who created the heavens and the earth. 

 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart (Jeremiah 29:11-13 NIV). 

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Worthy or Not?

January 27, 2016 / / 2 Comments

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Sinner. Bad. Weak. Ugly. Stupid. Dirty. Either we have had these words hurled at us by others, or we have given at least one of them to ourselves. If you are anything like me, then you are one of the many Christians who battle low self-esteem or self hatred.

However, this isn’t working. As Christians we are told to love God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength–and to love our neighbor as ourselves (Luke 10:27).

How can we love others the way Christ does if we can’t even like ourselves?

So many issues that people, especially teens, face today reflect our failure to see ourselves the way God does. Depression, eating disorders, self-harm, addictions, sexual promiscuity, and other unhealthy behaviors often stem from a root of self hatred. We don’t see ourselves as good or worthy of love, so how can God love us?

First of all, God really does love you.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life (John 3:16 KJV).

It does not surprise God that we aren’t perfect. He knows we screw up. He knows we make mistakes, and that we can’t possibly save ourselves. The Old Testament laws only served to remind humanity that we are inadequate on our own; we need a Savior.

God gave us His perfect, sinless Son Jesus Christ as payment for our sins and short-comings. Now even though Jesus is perfect and lived a sinless life, that doesn’t mean He can’t understand our imperfections. Jesus was tempted in every way we are (Hebrews 4:15), so He totally understands our weaknesses.

Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new (2 Corinthians 5:17).

Okay, so I’m a new creation in Christ now that I’ve accepted Him as my Savior. So why aren’t I perfect now? Here’s the thing–as Christians, we will still struggle with sin. In fact, the struggle might seem even worse as our hearts are convicted by the Holy Spirit.

Don’t worry. God knows this, and we are still covered by the blood of Jesus. All of our sins–past, present, and future–are covered by the blood of Jesus. This is not an excuse to go on sinning without a care, but it gives us the freedom to walk in the righteousness of Christ.

We are God’s children. You are His precious child. He knows you and loves you. He thinks you’re beautiful.  Even though you still struggle with sin, even though society tells you that you’re not enough, even though life can be hard, God loves you and nothing else can change this.

God’s love is relentless. 

You are worth it to God. You are worth being here. Once you believe that Jesus died for your sins and you surrender your life to Him, God gives you a new heart that is like His.

A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26).

Even though our flesh may fail, God knows our hearts. As long as we repent and have faith, He will forgive. The power of Jesus’ blood is greater than any sin we could ever commit. We are no longer stained or in bondage by our past mistakes. Instead we need to walk in the freedom that is made possible by what Jesus did for us!

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to comment and share 🙂

Just a reminder! This weekend I will be at winter camp with my church’s youth group, so there will be no post on Friday. Please pray for our trip, and that the students experience God in miraculous ways!

Don’t forget to join the #GoLoveSomeoneChallenge on Instagram (@fearfullywonderfullyme)!

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God's Disney Princesses

August 24, 2015 / / 8 Comments

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(Photo Credit)

Have you ever wondered, “what does God think of me?” How does he see me or feel about me? Unfortunately, two views of modern-day Christianity have distorted the truth of how God sees us.

The first lie we tend to believe is that, because we are sinners, that is all God sees. Yes, you and I have done some pretty bad things, and we likely will do some bad things again. We are human and therefore not perfect. God knows this, but He still loves us anyway.

This is hard for me to accept sometimes because I am naturally really hard on myself. God operates on grace; it really has nothing to do with what we’ve done, but everything to do with what Jesus did. We have been sanctified by the blood of Jesus, so now every bad thing we have ever done is washed away through repentance.

Wherefore Jesus also, that he might sanctify the people with his own blood, suffered without the gate (Hebrews 13:12 KJV).

You are not your sin, past or present. God has the mercy and grace to see beyond all that–even if the people around you can’t.

Another lie that many Christians believe is that the Bible is pretty much mediocre. We make sure we get our chapter or two in everyday, memorize a few Psalms, and revere the Gospels. Somehow modern-day culture has managed to disguise God’s sacred scriptures as a common book.

I’m not going to lie here–it can be hard to read the Bible sometimes. We all get busy, and sometimes it can be hard to understand given the fact that it was written in ancient times (which actually makes it pretty cool).

However, if you want to know what God feels about you or how much He loves you, all you have to do is start reading!

 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well (Psalm 139:14 KJV).

God made every part of you! Every hair on your head and freckle on your cheeks is numbered by Him.

 So the King will greatly desire your beauty; Because He is your Lord, worship Him (Psalm 45:11 NKJV).

Ladies, I think the majority of us have all wanted a guy to dote on us and call us beautiful. Guess what? Our heavenly King Jesus desires our beauty! This whole Psalm is a metaphor of Christ and His bride, the church. God really is the best romance author of all time (see Song of Songs).

As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. As a father pities his children, So the Lord pities those who fear Him. For He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust (Psalm 103:12-14 NKJV).

These verses are so awesome! Not only has Jesus washed away our sins completely from us, but we can’t even fathom how far gone they are. God is our father, and he cares about us. He has mercy on us because we are His precious children! He knows our bodies and how fragile we are.

The Psalms alone are powerful enough to bring us to tears over how much God loves us. Let’s dive into the Word of God in order to fully grasp who He is. 

Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to be a Disney princess. I wanted to wear a beautiful ball gown and fall in love with my prince charming who would protect me and take me on a grand adventure. But you know what, we are Disney princesses! Jesus is our King, and He loves us. Our Savior can transform us from just ordinary girls to extraordinary women of God! He has an awesome plan for our lives if we only surrender them to Him.

Do not forget who you are, lovely reader. No matter who you are or what your age, God loves you inside and out. And He is beckoning you to explore His word so He can show you His majesty.

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to comment and share 🙂

Confidence Crisis

June 15, 2015 / / 0 Comments

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There is a crisis happening among women and men of God. It’s not one that we can see on the outside, but it’s an inward struggle. It’s something that the devil wants to suck out of us so we feel powerless and useless for God’s kingdom.

It’s confidence.

I am not a confident person–at least not on my own. All my life I have been a bit too humble with self-esteem issues. Whether it be my appearance, my intelligence, or my abilities, I would always find something wrong with me. And I still tend to do this. It’s probably my greatest weakness.

But you know what? Jesus can take our weakest traits and use them for our good and His glory.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me (2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV).

Once again, it’s all about Jesus! When we are at our weakest and broken by sin, God has the chance to use His grace to redeem us and renew us with His power. He just wants us to get out of the way and make room for His grace and strength. We need to quit trying to run the show and let God take care of us.

I’ve been writing a lot about being confident in who God calls us to be, but I have to confess that it can be hard for me to live by. I am naturally shy. I love people, and I enjoy having fun–but meeting new people or stepping out of my comfort zone can be a real confidence killer for me.

However, the more I let God work in my life, the more my confidence seems to grow. When I let Christ lead me and strengthen me, I find that I can have courage in the midst of my fears. It’s not like all of a sudden all of my insecurities and worries go away, but I can get through them. It gets easier with time and prayer.

God’s confidence is not just for me–it’s for you as well! Jesus didn’t die for us so we could live timid lives. He wants us to be as bold as lions! I know that I will always be shy, and that’s okay. I believe this makes me a better observer and listener, which in turn helps me with my writing. Let God help you turn your weaknesses into strengths!

The Lord is the strength of my life…In this I will be confident (Psalm 27:1,3 NKJV)

Love, Emily <3

Thanks for reading! Please feel free to comment and share 🙂

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